Manifesting Manifesto: Setting the Record Straight on Manifesting.
This one is longer. Hey, if you want something in life you have to work for it. More on that later.
Let me start by admitting when I thought about focusing on this topic for a blog, I was unclear how to manifest. Well, I really had no idea. I also thought the idea of sending wishes out into the universe and expecting they would just come true to be somewhat woo-woo. So, I did some research, evaluated what I read against my own life experience and instincts, and that’s how this blog came to be.
So, this blog is not from a master manifesting genius, it is from a regular human that has done a few laps around the sun, some quite tough, and who has had some experience with overcoming a bent toward self-sabotage. I’ve included ideas I came across in my research that resonated with me, to talk about what manifesting is and how to do it in a way that can actually work.
Let’s begin.
PART 1: MANIFESTING IS NOT MAGIC.
While the idea of manifesting is not new, interest in the concept spiked during the pandemic. For example, the 369 method of manifesting (writing down what you want to manifest 3 times in the morning, 6 in the afternoon, and 9 times at night) went viral on Tik Tok, accruing millions and millions of views. This timing is not surprising given the pandemic created such a sense of uncertainty and chaos and manifesting in some way promises to be a tool we can use to gain more control over our lives. I think that’s really been the appeal of manifesting; that it can somehow get you the things you feel a little helpless about getting.
For some, manifesting is a notion that suggests we can will our goals into existence; if we clearly and deeply envision a goal, if we put it out into the world and believe in it as if it has already happened, it will happen. In contrast, if something we want didn’t happen it is because we didn’t really believe in it deeply enough.
I don’t think that is manifesting. I think that is magical thinking.
Developed out of the Law of Attraction, the concept of manifesting holds the belief that our thoughts have energy, a certain vibration, and what we think attracts events in our lives that resonate at the same vibration. Like magnets, positive thoughts attract positive, and vice-verse. I do believe positive thoughts are important to achieving the future we want, but I believe they work for different reasons we will explore later, as opposed to the magnetic pull of vibrations.
One problem with the “magical thinking” notion of manifesting is the idea that any negative event in your life is also your fault.
“Manifesting aims to put the individual in the driver’s seat of their own life and makes them responsible for the positive and negative effects in their lives.” (Katie O’Malley).
While I am a big believer of taking responsibility, we all know tragic events can happen to positive people, and life is not always in our control.
Looking deeper, one can detect an undercurrent of racism that is implicit in this magical concept of manifesting. According to Ruth La Ferla (2021):
“Manifesting carries an implicit rebuke to members of impoverished or disenfranchised communities, said Denise Fournier, a psychotherapist in Miami. Subtle or not, the message is insidious. “It’s ‘Why aren’t you manifesting a trip to Tulum? Why aren’t we seeing you on Instagram. You must not be a good manifester.’ That’s problematic.”
Equally problematic is believing we can just imagine our way into achieving our goals in life. In her 2015 book Rethinking Positive Thinking: Inside the New Science of Motivation, Gabriele Oettingen, a psychology professor at NYU, demonstrated the counterintuitive impact positive thoughts can have. In her research, she found the more positively dieters fantasized about weight loss, the less likely they were to lose weight. The more positively people fantasized about recovering from hip-replacement surgery, the less well they could move their joints post-op. Additionally, the more positively students fantasized about doing well on an exam, the lower they scored.
“What we find is the more positively people daydream and fantasize about their future desires and wishes coming true, the less they’ll actually put in the effort,” Oettingen explains.
Positive fantasizing, believing that positive thoughts alone can lead to outcomes you desire, can be counterproductive because they often lead to complacency.
I think people turn to a metaphysical idea of manifesting because it gives them a sense of agency and control in a world that feels more and more untethered. Belief may a necessary component in manifesting, but as Oettingen’s studies show, it not sufficient.
“What makes it so ‘woo’ is that people want to believe that they can close their eyes and wish for a mega-mansion, that having that having the right crystals can make it happen. But it just doesn’t work that way.” Dr. Fournier (NYT)
So, what is true manifesting & how does it work?
PART 2: THE REAL ‘MAGIC’ IN MANIFESTING: A MINDSET RESET
I believe the real magic of manifesting is the power it has to shift your mindset. Manifesting is about clarifying your goals and creating mindset shifts away from limiting beliefs by actually feeling and picturing the life you want and then practicing visualizing your way through obstacles blocking you from attaining those goals.
Let’s break all of this down.
“Working on your mindset in the first instance is key to manifesting”, says Moon Onyx Starr.
“If you want to attract money into your life but you have negative emotions and limiting beliefs surrounding money, then you’re actually preventing it from coming into your life…The same goes for love, success or anything else that you would like to manifest.” (O’Malley)
According to self-development coach Roxie Nafousi:
“Manifesting is the ability to use the power of your mind to change and create the reality you experience…We manifest not from our thoughts, but from our beliefs about what we are worthy of which means that self-love is the driving force behind manifesting…To attract anything into your life, you must first believe you are worthy of having it.”
So much of what gets in our way is our own thoughts. If you don’t believe it can happen, it will not happen. If you don’t think you deserve it, it will not happen. If we cannot imagine ourselves having and doing the things we say we want, and especially if we do not believe we are capable or worthy, we are unlikely to commit ourselves to taking the steps necessary to reach those goals. Instead, we will find ways to sabotage ourselves and our progress via procrastination, hesitation, rejecting opportunities, and other dumb decisions. Our thoughts have a powerful impact on deciding the direction of our lives.
A way to bypass our negative beliefs is to practice visualizing the opposite. Imagining yourself achieving the life you want, the process of visualization, is not just magic; the impact can be neurological, it can actually change your brain.
Our brain has a “filtering system” called the Reticular Activating System (RAS). According to scientific calculations, the human body sends 11 million bits of information per second to the brain for processing, yet the conscious mind can only process 50 bits per second. It would be impossible to function if we had to pay attention to all the information there is out there in the world, and it is the RAS that filters in some information while blocking out others. However, the RAS is programed by us. We, affected by our own history, are the ones who decide what information is important to pay attention to. And guess what? This is how we often limit ourselves. For example, we tag as important information that fits with our belief systems. We essentially look for evidence that confirms what we believe (a.k.a. confirmation bias) instead of seeing the truth.
However, when we actively and frequently visualize alternative futures from what we originally limited ourselves to believe, we can essentially reprogram our RAS to start noticing information that fits with this new vision of our lives. We notice opportunities, we notice when we do well, we notice the next steps we can take to making our goals a reality.
Have you ever noticed that when you decide, for example, you want a yellow car you start to see yellow cars everywhere? It’s not that there are more yellow cars, it is just your brain is now primed to notice yellow cars. I’ve had an experience of thinking about a particular topic or issue I want to figure out or understand, and I just keep it somewhere in the back of my mind. As I keep living my life, doing what I do, reading, listening to podcasts, talking to people, I start to notice information coming in that can help me solve my task. It’s like Brené Brown will suddenly say something that ties everything together with regard to the problem I am trying to solve, even if the topic of her podcast is not seemingly connected to my issue of concern. Everything I start to take in from my environment gets filtered through the notch to see if it might be helpful.
Naming and then visualizing that thing we want creates the “notch” or groove in your brain which works as a kind of filter that scans the environment for anything related to that notch.
In this way, manifesting is actually a process that creates a mindset reset, that allows us to push through all of our internal obstacles and resistance to reaching our goal.
PART 3: THE POWER BEHIND MANIFESTING: ACTION!
Manifesting requires a critical component beyond mindset and belief. This is the part that gets left out of the woo-woo ideas of manifesting, but nothing will manifest without it; and that is action! While the magic in manifesting is about shifting your mindset, the power of manifesting comes from actual action.
According to Dorothy Ratusny:
“Manifesting is seeing [and feeling] the future of what you want now in this moment; and then taking the steps to make this your reality in the physical world.”
The fullest and most resonant explanation of manifesting I came across was from Mel Robbins. Robbins describes manifesting as a process of “preparing/training your mind, body, spirit to help you take the action to get what you want.” She says it is a way of “socializing your mind,” and “rehearsing your mind to take the steps before you take the steps… retraining your nervous system or body to do the work that’s necessary to getting what you want.” It is a method we can use to overcome self-doubt, resistance, excuses, and other self-limiting behaviors and beliefs.
Robbins emphasizes that:
“Just thinking about what you want isn’t going to get it done…What ultimately creates results in your life are action…Manifesting is going to help you see, feel and act your way towards the things you want.”
For Robbins, manifesting is NOT wishing, wanting, hoping, or dreaming. It is not magic. She sees wishing and hoping as internally giving away our power to some outside force that decides and has control. Manifesting, instead, is a commitment we make to create the future we want through our own action. It allows us to see the power inside ourselves to do the work that would change your life.
PART 4: BUT IT’S ALSO SCIENCE.
According to Robbins, manifesting done properly is a process based on science.
“Your brain can’t distinguish between real experiences you have lived and the detailed experienced you have imagined and felt through manifesting.”
The key then to manifesting is to rehearse the steps you need to take towards what you want with as much detail as possible. Many proponents of manifesting focus on imagining the end goal, visualizing and thinking as if what you want has already happened. Robbins on the other hand focuses on visualizing, in great detail, the steps you need to take to get to your goal. She talks about it as visualizing the “bridge.” When you envision and FEEL yourself doing each step, dealing with every potential obstacle, we begin to register that experience in our brain and prepare our nervous system to deal with it. It’s like practicing the steps. Consistently visualizing the steps builds in us a sense of possibility, which is also motivating. Then when we take each step in real life, our brains are already prepared to deal with each obstacle that comes in our way.
Studies have in fact supported this idea. Fatmata Kamara, a mental health nurse advisor in UK notes:
‘Previous research has also found the ability to visualize events before they take place can help with the decision-making process, meaning the decision maker is able to eliminate options which would be less successful.’
We all know practice makes perfect. In this case, manifesting is a process of mentally and emotionally practicing the steps we need to take, as well the obstacles (internal and external) we need to overcome, which prepares us to do the actual work we need to do to achieve our ideal life.
PART 5: SO, HOW DO WE ACTUALLY DO IT? 5-STEPS TO MANIFESTING.
1. BE CLEAR ABOUT WHAT YOU REALLY WANT.
Manifesting starts with gaining clarity on what you really want your life to look and FEEL like. There are many ways to do this step:
a. Robbins says, “give yourself permission to dream with the lid off.” We stop ourselves from thinking and dreaming freely about what we really want; we allow doubt, fear, even societal expectations to get in the way. One way to counteract this is every morning write down 5 things you want. (research shows you are 42% more likely to achieve goals simply by writing them down) but really allow yourself to “want what you want.”
b. Be as clear and concise as possible. If you are searching for a dream job, imagine what your workday would look like, imagine your co-workers and environment, imagine your commute, your desk, your paycheck. This is all giving yourself permission to imagine what is possible and allowing yourself to believe it is possible for you.
c. Speak your intentions out loud. Create a vision board of goals and dreams for your future. Use pictures, words, symbols to remind yourself of your goals, and keep that vision board in a place where you will see it every day. You can also create a ‘future box” with pictures of items you want to manifest. This stage may sound like “magical thinking,” but I think the magic here is really to keep the goal in front of you – to remind yourself to focus on what you really want. The world we live in is manic and offers so many distractions that take us away from what we truly want and believe. Technology allow us to move much faster than is our biologically optimal pace, at least for most of us. There are the latest trends that we all believe we MUST engage in to stay relevant or ahead. These are all distraction. The REAL thing is the goal. If we keep our vision focused we will get there faster and stronger.
2. PRACTICE VISUALIZING THE STEPS ON THE BRIDGE TO YOUR FUTURE, ESPECIALLY THE OBSTACLES YOU MAY MEET ON THE WAY.
a. Visualize the steps. While speaking or visualizing your goals into existence is important, solely focusing on the end goal can actually be detrimental. Research shows if people just focus on end goal, they begin to feel unmotivated or discouraged because typically, they are far from achieving it. According to Robbins, manifesting is not about visualizing the end goal, it is about visualizing the steps on “the bridge that connects where you are now with your end goal.”
b. Feel the steps. It’s important here to really FEEL what each step would be like. Robbins explains, “Feeling magnifies the imagery in your mind,” and tricks your brain into experiencing the imagery as real. “When you visualize yourself doing the work, visualizing leads you to do the work…Preparing your mind, and visualizing yourself doing it, lowers the resistance and leads you to taking the action.” For Robbins it is also important to feel a sense of pride while you envision doing the work, “pride amplifies the memory imprint – it is a booster – it supersizes the imprint of rehearsing.”
c. Imagine the Obstacles. A critical part of this process is to visualize the obstacles to your goal as well as how you might overcome them. Oettingen calls this technique “mental contrasting”, where in addition to focusing on a goal, you focus equally on the obstacles in your way. It is a way of rehearsing and solving problems before you meet them.
3. AND…ACTION!!
You need to do the work! Work towards your goals. Nothing happens without action. According to Gabrielle Bernstein, author of Super Attractor, “Manifesting is known as co-creating because it’s a collaboration between you and the Universe.” Knowing what you want is only half of the formula, there are no results without action. (Zapata, 2020).
Here are steps you can take:
a. Think about the steps you can take, even now, to reach goal and build them into your daily routine. If you want to be a life coach for example, set aside 20 mins a day to research life coach training programs. Once you have settled on one, set aside even 40 mins each morning to work through the program.
b. Ask yourself what your future self, the one you want to become, would be thinking and doing, then do that in little ways now. If you want to become a reader for example, a reader reads, so start with setting aside 10 minutes a day to incorporate reading into your life. If you want to be healthy or fit, think about what a healthy person would do. What would they eat? What would their day look like? When and where would they exercise? Then start with incorporating small pieces of this lifestyle into your life now. Join a gym, order some green juices. Why does this work? According to Angela Lombardo (author: A Spiritual Entrepreneur), it’s about reframing your mind, “being the person who already has, does, and feels your goals, dreams, and desires helps you become that person.”
c. Give out what you want to grow and get. According to Oprah, “If you want more love in your life, set an intention to be more loving. If you seek kindness, focus your energy on empathy and compassion.”
4. BE THANKFUL.
Adopt a gratitude practice. Recognize each movement in your journey. When you appreciate each step, it grounds you and helps you not to dismiss and take for granted what it takes to get to where you already are. It also helps you recognize what you have already achieved which can be a powerful motivator to keep you moving forward. Examples may be:
a. At the end of the day write down What Went Well (WWW) that day: especially take note of things that brought you closer to your goals.
b. Before you go to bed each night jot down 3 things you are grateful for: particularly anything that moved you forward to what you want to manifest.
c. Celebrate the small wins. According to Robbins, “All the small movements – even visualizing - are signs of progress and movement. When you call out the small wins, you build momentum and you are rewarding your body for aligning with what you want, it builds confidence, courage, energy, motivation.”
5. WORK ON YOUR MINDSET AND YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS.
Remember, our thoughts have a powerful impact on our lives. The way to get over limiting beliefs is first, identify them, then challenge them. Here are some tools:
a. Explore, then replace your limiting beliefs. Bernstein suggests asking yourself “what are the beliefs I have about myself that may be inhibiting my progress?” Write those down. Then Cross out the limiting beliefs and write affirmations in their place instead. Replace any negative feelings with positive ones. Zapata provides an example in her article: “if your limiting belief is ‘I am incomplete without a man,’ reverse it with ‘I am complete as I am.’ If your limiting belief is ‘I’m not good enough,’ reverse it with ‘I am wonderful as I am today.’” One method I use to get over my belief that, “I don’t deserve x” is I say to myself “what makes you so special to not deserve what you believe others deserve? You are human, like everyone else, we all deserve, and are capable, of x.”
c. Focus on the positive. Focus on joy, happiness, positivity. You always have a choice. Nothing in life is one thing, nothing is just good or just bad, well, not most things. You can decide what side of that to focus your energy on, and what you focus your energy on, grows around you. Growing a positive mindset requires attention and work. There is no magic to it, it takes awareness, openness, and redirection; if you find yourself moving toward negative thoughts and energy, stop, step back (in your mind) and redirect.
d. Curate who you spend your time with. This is critical. We absorb the energy of others; if we are around nay-sayers, complainers, pessimistic people, we will be influenced by their perspective. So, pick people you admire and want to be like, and spend time with them.
Let’s end with this quote from Nafousi:
“The real art of manifesting comes from being proactive, fearless, taking risks, and stepping outside our comfort zone. It comes from our subconscious beliefs about what we deserve and from our self-worth.”
And here, I end my Manifesto. Happy Manifesting.
REFERENCES:
De Rosée, Sophie. (January, 2022). https://www.ft.com/content/6fed8d95-1917-4e78-91c6-b0bacf04f03c
Haupt, Angela. (March, 2021). https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/wellness/manifest-attraction-covid-work-369/2021/03/12/62d22144-81f6-11eb-9ca6-54e187ee4939_story.html
Hunt, Elle. (April, 2022). https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2022/apr/21/is-mainfesting-real-the-secret
Jennings, Rebecca. (October 2020). https://www.vox.com/the-goods/21524975/manifesting-does-it-really-work-meme
La Ferla, Ruth. (January, 2021). https://www.nytimes.com/2021/01/20/style/self-care/how-to-manifest-2021.html
O’Malley, Katie. (January, 2022). https://www.elle.com/uk/life-and-culture/culture/a38802302/how-to-manifest/
Ratusny, Dorothy. https://insighttimer.com/blog/how-to-manifest/
Robbins, Mel. (April, 2022). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZHqUE9U_us
Zapata, Kimberly. (December, 2020). https://www.oprahdaily.com/life/a30244004/how-to-manifest-anything/