The Chore List
I’ll be honest—I’ve been staring at this page for hours. I’m sure we’ve all been here at one time or another. We watch the cursor pulse as one hour passes, then two… then the evening is gone in the blink of an eye and we’re sitting right where we started. The frustrating thing is that lately I find this happening not with the obligatory tasks, but with things I enjoy. I want to write more. I want to read more. I want to be able to curl up and watch a movie on a rainy day without distraction. But my tank is already empty by the time I have a chance to do the things that fill it. So, what do we do when our sources of joy become our hardest chores?
Today, I would like to share a method that has begun to help integrate these things back into my life. In an effort to unjumble my brain, I’ve come up with a chore list. Each “chore” is something that drains me on a regular basis. I have matched something joyful with each one and have been experimenting with attainable ways to implement them in my life. As an example, I am going to discuss two of my biggest chores at the moment. These will look different for everyone, but I hope this list can spark ideas for your own ways to turn your “chores” back into nourishing and joyful activities.
Chore #1: People
Ok, I know this may sound harsh to start here, but hear me out! Most of us spend the majority of our days interacting with other people. Personally, I have found that a large amount of my stress stems from high-impact interactions. Some examples of what I consider high-impact interactions would be conversations that involve conflict or problem-solving, projects at work and the collaboration they require, and conversations or time spent with people who, to put it simply, may not be the healthiest people for us. I have had weeks when these types of interactions have left me so drained that I missed opportunities to spend time with the people I love most. Or, if I did participate, I have had to drag myself through it while being too tired to really enjoy myself. In order to bring joy back into the interactions that matter most, I have been leaning into my schedule instead of working against it. Don’t underestimate the impact of saying “Hey, let’s walk together and chat on our way to the car”. Or “I have an errand to run and would love some company—want to join?”. Aiming for small opportunities of integration will fill your cup more than agonizing the time you don’t have ever will.
Chore #2: Reading
I have always been a reader. Books have been my favorite escape for as long as I can remember, and I have been missing that greatly in my adult life. I find that lately if I have ten minutes or so and using it to read crosses my mind, I usually opt for an activity that feels…easier. The fact is, I consume a large amount of written media every single day. From 9- 5, I read articles, reports, and industry research for my job. During downtime at work and immediately after, I scroll through social media and take in even more written information (while not even absorbing much of it). So, by the time I think of reading for fun, it just feels like more work. I have found an unexpected fix for this: crossword puzzles. I decided to download the New York Times puzzle app after observing that social media leaves me feeling both exhausted and under-stimulated. This has given me a way to still be on my phone if that is all I feel like I can handle. I have found that replacing even a small amount of my scrolling in this way gives me a feeling of accomplishment. I have found myself looking less for a way to turn my brain “off” at the end of the day, and more for ways to use it in fun and stimulating ways that still feel like a break. This has encouraged to pick up my book at the end of the day by reminding me how much better it feels to keep my mind active not just in work, but in leisure.
I encourage you to take a look at your own list today. What things that you used to enjoy have become tiresome? The truth is you deserve to reclaim them. You deserve to have that joy back in your life, even if it is in the smallest, simplest ways. We all have many chores to tackle, but I am proud of myself, and you, for starting.