The Escape Artist

I am an escape artist.

I imagine you are too.

We’ve all learned how to become escape artists.

The tools and methods we use might differ, but each of us, in some way, have mastered the art of escape.

Some of us use television, many of us pack our schedules to stay busy from the moment we awaken to the time we fall into bed, and almost all of us use the electronic gadgets we are incessantly tethered to.  Some forms of escape, like constantly working, moving, producing, are essentially celebrated, while other forms of escape, like addictions, are agreed to be enormously detrimental.  Some remain in the confusing space in-between; think binging Telly, or even the culture of consumerism – is it just fun or might it be another problematic form of escape? 

The ubiquitous need to escape begs the question: what are we escaping from?

One guess is, hard things; things that cause discomfort like hurt, sadness, fear, conflict, insecurity, anger, loneliness, and perhaps most poignantly, a sense of unworthiness.  The busy-ness, the buzz of distractions, the constant striving and looking outward and forward into the future, are often ways of numbing and disconnecting from our uncomfortable emotions.   

We are running from our own fragility, vulnerability, brokenness, maybe even shame.

Ultimately, we seem to be running from our humanness.

As it is with most things, however, life is paradoxical.  Our emotions, our vulnerabilities, may be the cause of much pain and suffering but they are also the access point of joy, satisfaction, beauty, awe, meaning and purpose. 

If you think about the things in life that have given you the deepest level of fulfillment so far, I bet they weren’t the easy things. What creates a sense of achievement and growth is having worked to conquer something difficult. Our most meaningful life experiences were likely filled with complexities, pain, and struggle.

Anything we truly care about is bound to hurt us.   Life isn’t a straight line, there is gain and loss at each step, so anything important to us, anything we love or are attached to, will bring us both joy and pain as we flow through the vicissitudes.

When we work to escape the hard stuff, we also deprive ourselves of the good stuff, the hard things that give life purpose and meaning. The trick is staying in and remaining open to experiencing all of it. 

Escape artists, however, are never truly present.   When we deprive ourselves of presence, we prevent ourselves from fully absorbing a moment: exploring the mysteries of it, drinking in its deliciousness, and discovering the awe of it.  We deprive ourselves of the ingredients of joy.

Unless we get intimate with the moments in our lives, we are never fully alive.

The only way to aliveness then, is through pain.

And that is the ultimate of paradoxes.

So, escape artists, buckle up. 

It’s time to sign in for the full ride.